Peanuts. Yeah, they’re a ground-grown legume. But, kids grow from the ground-up, too.

My fondness for the Peanuts gang started at a very young age, probably around the age of 5. Only now in my 20s, have I realized though, just how much I adore SNOOPY, and of course wee lil Woodstock. I always even as child, could sense, and feel a cuteness to it, could appreciate this concept of the cute, and the sheer fun of what was going on in the cartoons on tv. That was where most of my exposure to the comic came from as a child, from watching all the specials especially. It helped having “supportive” parents, too. Whenever Peanuts was on, they’d leave it on and sit me in front of the screen. Maybe they too (as I do now), had a secret desire for “Snoopy for President”! Ha! I just know, for some reason, appreciation for this brilliant little treasure of animation runs through my family, apparently.

I really came to have a deeper interest in the series after a discussion of all things, with my therapist in the Bronx! She actually explained to me, that the child whom Charlie Brown was based on was in fact a real person whom Charles Schulz knew as a child, and that she actually was an acquaintance of this man! She explained to me, that part of Schulz’s intention in making the comic was to (quietly) showcase the varying neurosis that children can develop. If you look at each character, you can see that each one struggles with a singular, unique underlying issue. After having this revealed to me, thinking about it, then proceeding to watch episodes of the animated cartoon, it was really clear to me to see! Give it a try! Lucy for instance, is self-affirming because of her insecurities; she bullies others and is nasty in order to build herself up. Charlie Brown himself, is self-deprecating in many respects, or rather, perhaps better put, simply does not respect himself in many ways; he has no self-confidence and puts himself down. Even Snoopy and Woodstock have a co-dependent relationship of their own, where while at times they’re snuggling and the best of friends, (and so are many of the children shown this way in various scenes), the next minute Snoopy is at Woodstock’s throat. All this, I find fascinating.

Amidst such fascination, amidst such acuity of mind in utilizing a popular cartoon to quietly get this message out to people, I find a great comfort in the cartoon. And I always have. Maybe it is and was because subconsciously, it was so human and real. I know it may sound silly to speak of regarding this comic, but there is passion there. Everything is soft to me in it, and I think now as an adult, it is partly because I can see the struggles, and the puzzle pieces that each of those characters are as a part of myself. Each of them truly is a piece of the human puzzle. Thanks for reading!

“So close and yet so far”. Someone said that to me yesterday, and it made me to contemplate on it.
We say it so often, and it can be used for many reasons. What do you think of the statement? What does it make you feel, when you’re using it? I thought about how if you’re near someone physically, whom you “like”, have an attraction to, and they have no feelings for you, you are “so close and yet, so far”. You are worlds away in many respects. But it made me think, am I really even physically close to them then, truly, since inwardly, there is no closeness. If inwardly there is no closeness, are you really near them even physically? I say this because it is almost as if they do not see you physically anyway. But of course at the same time, you cannot deny the reality that you ARE standing right next to them. It makes me sad, when I think on this phrase.

This is a joining of two souls, simply because I have chosen to write about both topics at the same time.

I thought of suicide. I thought of the taking of one’s own life. I have noticed a pattern, in the taking of one person’s own life, and this pattern usually includes a group of people, no matter how large or small. It seems to come in clusters of people: you have the person who the world would entirely see, the world in its majority, those groups of people, as having absolutely nothing to contribue and nothing worthhile, even though that person is highly intelligent, brilliant. But, this person is often overlooked, having no degree from a university/college, no proclamations to make about important venues they have exhibited as a visual artist, played in as an artist, outlets through which their writings have been published, etc. This person seemingly cannot get their foot in the door.
(That’s why Brooklyn exists; simply to make it simple for selfish people).
Then, there is that person (or often several), your typical, lost and messed up soul who calls you friend in name, but quite suddenly will turn around and ignore you. This is because they have their own problems, of course, but never realize what they are fully, can never put a finger on what their troubles are, to the extent that you can. So really, whilst this person is pained, they still live ignorantly, blissfully.
And then, let’s say there are three in the group, you the core, the one who is suicidal, you have that other friend who is just kind of there; he or she replies to things you say, but doesn’t really care if you wish them a happy birthday or not, and won’t go to your birthday party.
These are just a few examples of persons in the mix, in that pool whom it seems often to be part of everything, that either contribute to, or…. are just there in the life of the person in the center, who winds up taking their own life. contribute to the one person in the center killing themselves.

Now let’s talk a little bit about the CONCEPT of determinism, which strangely, in its simplicity, has been able to be made into an actual “philosophy”. First off, this actually brilliantly ties in with what I just wrote above, as the determinist-mind will say to you, “That person had no choice but to kill themselves; that was it, and nothing else could be done; they arrived at that point and that was how it was meant to turn out”. You see, in ALL situations, even if we may not be capable emotionally at the time, of carrying out what we would TRULY want, through knowing the truth and what is right in our intellect, and instead choose the “wrong” the “less excellent”, that which merely hurts us more, in ALL scenarios, there are always AT LEAST TWO OPTIONS, minimal, if not more. And, I repeat, options. Now, that does not mean that you in that moment, as I said, may be capable of choosing that other option. However, simply by virtue of the fact that there IS in fact another choice that you KNOW about, though may be unable to mentally, physically, emotionally carry out, this rather pummels the entire concept of determinism to the ground. See, determinists do not believe that there is such thing as free will. They believe for example, that because they were raised in an aggressive Evangelical household, they did not choose to become an atheist. Now, part of that may be true. But, what has happened in this scenario, is that in woundedness from this “Christianity”, they have become so hurt and frightened, that they have sunk into what feels more safe and comfortable. And yes, they may not be capable of confronting Christianity, nor wanting to ever explore it, BUT, to deny that what they were instructed in, in that type of Christianity, to acknowledge that they simply were misled and what they were taught was not true Christianity, is defeatist. I mean not a bit of this in a harsh way. Here is a better and more straightforward example: You did something, you chose to do something, that you really didn’t want to do, but you just couldn’t help it in the moment. And yes it’s true, in that moment emotionally you had not the strength to choose otherwise. BUT, your awareness of the fact that you chose what you really would not have wanted to choose, shows that you ARE free. You now have the freedom to work more on yourself! You realize how you have been hurt, and perhaps next time, or the time after, you can choose better. Determinists sadly view free will as something black and white: that the concept is, things are easy, and we can either choose one or the other, while they as determinists know, just as we do, making choices is not easy, but they seem to think that we falsely believe we have the power to merely choose something, even if it is difficult.

No determinism. All the way.

This is what pornography does. It makes a gender offensive. It makes that gender something to shame or be ashamed of. sadly, overwhelmingly by virtue of the genitalia, the woman in heterosexual porn more specifically, has agreed to rape- a rape that she enjoys- the purpose of these scenarios that we see primarily, is to completely magnify, glorify, the man’s genitalia, in a way that gives power, such as, the woman afterwards treating the penis as though it as done a good job etc- the purpose is to make him feel like the king, but why should i say king and not queen? is king more dominating than queen? you see, none of the terms we use for gender that are meant to be equal make sense anyway, if they truly are equal- we don’t say, that in porn, when she is placing her protruding genital into him, that it makes her the queen- we always somehow defer to the male title- you see the woman in porn is not awake- she is not aware- it not much different from a woman murdering someone in cold blood, or a mass murderer- they are disengaged
i saw a quote tonight that said people will accept seeing writings or tv shows of an axe going into someone’s skull, but when detailed sexual acts are written out or portrayed on tv, people write in and say i will never watch your show again- well, the truth is, both are equally evil and disgusting BUT we must think of it like this- WHICH of the 2, if a child, if a sensitive person who knows it’s wrong etc, watches it, has the likelihood of distorting the person’s image of their own body? our BODY. our BODY is our first boundary given to us by God, and more specifically, our skin. there is a RIGHT way to use the body, and these people are not in the right, not when it’s casually yet detailed in its showing on a popular tv show, a woman getting it in the behind, etc. Never. But, it points to something, doesn’t it? That people can live and NOT be AWAKE to things, yes? Which only further proves that there is an objective truth. Just as I wrote before, that when a person commits murder in cold blood, they aren’t even awake, really, even if premeditated. It is no different from the sex in porn that the disjointed pair are partaking of.